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This text describes various aspects of academia in Pigsmoke School for Sorcerership located within America's finest learning institution named Pigsmoke Academy (PAS). The main character is the faculty member who navigates through cutthroat and academically challenging environments while managing a department with conservative tasksmasters, overly-strict Deans' Offices that want to ensure he/she follows their rules. Students exist solely for achieving tenure as professors must follow Dean's office guidelines such as avoiding burnout by not going adventuring or indulging in personal life issues like garbage fires which will ultimately end up humiliating death; they should stay away from cutthroat department heads and work hard on research projects to maintain good grades, while the bureaucracy system of academia discourages advancement.