GameSearch

It's 5 PM on a Friday and you're so, *so* tired. Unfortunately, you still have a *lot* of work to do by Monday, so it looks like you're going to spend the weekend working for free, off the records, just for fun.

Or...

*(You reach in your backpack and take out a chainsaw)*

You could chainsaw your boss.

-----

They've begun running when they heard you revving up the immensely loud engine. You try to assure them you're only going to lightly decrease their breathing abilities and blood budget for the next quarter. They kick and scream but you're stronger, and push them to the ground.

They try to tell you they have children, but so do you, and who gives a fuck?

(Roll a D6, if you roll 4 or higher keep reading, otherwise the game ends in your death: your boss overpowers you and bangs their 80s phone on your head, killing you instantly with the power of blunt force trauma.)

You cut off their legs. Blood splatters everywhere. It tastes like strawberry jam.

They begin to crawl, screaming, like some kind of fucked up nugget of a man. You stop their crawling by pushing your weight onto their back with your foot.

"Where the hell do you think you're going? I'm not done discussing my proposals regarding how we could improve team morale in the workplace."

You rev up the chainsaw engine again.

"For example we could start by killing our boss and replacing them with someone competent."

They scream. You scream. The cops downstairs scream. You cut up your boss in 46 pieces.

The cops arrive at your floor.

"I fucking love piggies."

(Roll a D6, if you roll 4 or higher keep reading, otherwise the game ends in your death: the cops empty several cartridges into you, making you look like some kind of fucked french cheese. The ones with holes.)